This man was wearing a dark purple velvet sport coat, solid black shades, and had his short gray hair swept back. He was walking with a purpose.

I feel like he might have been an assassin. Something just wasn’t right about this guy. He was looking too cool for someone walking down a side street in a purple velvet sport coat.

So I strolled over to WordPress.org to look for something to take so my lazy butt doesn’t have to put an effort into being original. What I quickly realized was that they all look like blog themes. Dang it, I don’t want my blog to look like a blog. I want it to be a rectangle, but have the feel of a triangle. 

So, maybe I give in and accept that it has to look like a blog. If I select any one of these premade themes, I can rest restlessly knowing that somewhere, somebody else is using the same theme. It’s like buying a can of delicious Planters whole cashews with sea salt, getting home, and finding out somebody took off the foil seal at the store and left it to age, rot, and generally get nasty. Or poisoned it.

The point is, I want a unique WordPress theme. Of course I don’t want to put any effort into it, don’t be silly. Heck no, I’m not going to pay for it. If I had the resources in house, I’d do it myself for free!

This world is ridiculous and I wash my feet and my hands of it.